Ah, summer. Long, lazy days filled with sunshine, family vacations, and carefree fun. At least, that’s what the commercials would have you believe.
But for many parents, summer isn’t a break—it’s a complex—a juggling act, and a stress-inducing puzzle of childcare, activities, and disrupted routines.
I get it. As a licensed psychologist (and a mom who has experienced my fair share of summer transitions with kiddos), I know that while our children may be excited, parents often feel overwhelmed.
The structure of the school year disappears overnight, and suddenly, you’re scrambling for camps, coordinating playdates, and trying to balance work, life, and keeping everyone entertained without losing your sanity.
So let’s talk about you. Not your kids, not their schedules, but you—because you matter. This transition isn’t just about them; it’s about how you manage parenting stress, find support, and take care of yourself so you can actually enjoy summer rather than just survive it.
The Invisible Load of Summer Break
You know that mental to-do list that never stops running? The one that wakes you up at 3 AM with thoughts like:
Did I register for that camp before it filled up?
What am I going to do with the kids while I work?
Why is childcare in the summer so expensive?!
Will I ever get five minutes to myself again?
Summer break adds a whole new level to the “mental load” that parents carry. It’s exhausting. In fact, parenting styles rrl research shows that parents experience increased stress levels during school breaks due to disrupted routines and increased caregiving responsibilities (APA, 2022).
The Case of the Disappearing Self-Care
Take Lisa, for example. Lisa is a working mom of two who thought she had her summer all planned out. Camps were booked, family vacations were scheduled, and babysitters lined up.
But two weeks in, reality hit. The camps only ran half-days, her babysitter had to cancel at the last minute, and her kids were constantly complaining, “I’m bored!” She found herself working late at night just to catch up, living off coffee and sheer willpower.
One night, exhausted and on the verge of tears, Lisa realized she hadn’t had a moment to herself in weeks. She recognized that when anxiety takes over, her patience thinned, and she snapped at her kids more than usual. She knew something had to change.
So, she sat down and scheduled “me time” like a work meeting—30 minutes every day to do something just for her. At first, it felt indulgent, but soon, those small breaks became a lifeline. Whether it was a short walk, reading a book, or simply sitting in silence, Lisa found that caring for herself made her more present and patient with her family.
Co-Parenting During Summer—Making It Work
Jessica and Tom were divorced and co-parenting their two kids. Summer always brought tension—who gets the kids for which vacation? How do they split time fairly while balancing work schedules? One summer, they found themselves in a full-blown argument over a last-minute change, leaving everyone stressed, including the kids.
After a particularly rough week, in the Spring, they decided to sit down and plan their summer before it started. They created an online calendar that they shared, outlining trips, camps, and weekends in advance.
They also agreed to a “24-hour cooling-off” rule—if something needed to change, they’d wait a day before responding to avoid knee-jerk reactions.
The result? It was a much smoother summer, with fewer conflicts and more focus on making memories rather than arguing about logistics. Sometimes, a little planning goes a long way.
Managing Work-From-Home with Kids: The Ultimate Test of Patience
Meet Rachel, a freelance graphic designer and mom of two. During the school year, she had a solid routine: drop the kids off, work uninterrupted for a few hours, and enjoy a quiet coffee break before school pickup. But summer? Summer turned her home office into a circus.
Her Zoom meetings were constantly interrupted by screams of “He took my LEGO!” or “I’m hungry again!” She tried to multitask, but deadlines piled up, and so did her frustration. One particularly chaotic morning, she found herself hiding in the laundry room just to answer emails in peace.
Rachel knew she had to shift her approach. She implemented a daily “quiet time” for an hour after lunch—books, puzzles, or movies only. She also reached out to a neighbor and arranged playdate swaps, giving each of them a few blessed hours of uninterrupted work time. It wasn’t perfect, but it was better. It wasn't perfect, but it was better. And sometimes, better is enough.
Self-Care Isn’t Selfish—It’s Essential
Let’s debunk a common myth: self-care isn’t about spa days and bubble baths (though, hey, if that’s your thing, do it!). It’s about doing anything that fills your cup so you don’t run on empty.
Some simple ways to prioritize yourself this summer:
Schedule “me time” like an appointment. Block it on your calendar and treat it as non-negotiable.
Get outside. Even a short walk can help reset your mind.
Find a summer rhythm that includes breaks for you. Maybe that means quiet coffee in the morning before the kids wake up or an evening wind-down ritual.
Say no. You don’t have to attend every BBQ or sign up for every activity. Prioritize what truly matters.
Research confirms that self-care reduces stress and improves overall well-being (National Institute of Mental Health, 2023).
⏰ The 10-Minute Reset
Meet Jordan, a stay-at-home dad who found himself drowning in summer chaos. He loved being home with his kids but felt like he was always on duty. Every request, every meltdown, and every snack break fell on him, leaving him feeling depleted by midday.
One particularly overwhelming afternoon, Jordan locked himself in the bathroom, took 10 deep breaths, and reminded himself he wasn’t a cruise director. That tiny break helped him reframe his mindset.
He started implementing 10-minute resets throughout his day—whether that meant stepping outside alone, listening to his favorite podcast, or just sitting in silence. At first, it felt insignificant, but after a week, he noticed a shift. He was more patient, more engaged, and, most importantly, he felt like himself again.
Managing the Guilt of Taking a Break
Many parents struggle with guilt when they prioritize themselves, feeling like they should be doing more for their kids. But the truth is, taking care of yourself makes you a better parent.
Meet Sarah, a mom of three who loves her kids but was barely holding it together by mid-June. Between work deadlines, swim lessons, and endless snack requests, she felt like she was constantly running on empty. Every night, she collapsed into bed, exhausted and resentful, wondering when she’d ever get a break.
Then came the breaking point—she forgot to sign her youngest up for summer camp, and there were no spots left. She felt like a failure, even though she was doing everything she could. That’s when she reached out for individual coaching.
Through coaching, Sarah realized she had been putting everyone else’s needs ahead of her own, and it was draining her physically and emotionally. She developed strategies she felt good about for setting boundaries, carving out time for herself without guilt, and shifting her mindset so she could enjoy summer instead of just surviving it.
By mid-July, Sarah wasn’t just getting through the summer—she was enjoying it. She learned to delegate, say no to activities that weren’t serving her, and prioritize her well-being. And you know what? Her kids were happier too because she wasn’t snapping at them out of exhaustion.
Learning to Let Go of “Perfect”
Emily, a mom of three, always felt the need to create the “perfect” summer for her kids. She signed them up for endless activities, planned elaborate outings, and rarely took a moment for herself.
One day, after snapping at her kids over something minor, she realized that her exhaustion was making her irritable. She decided to try something different—one low-key day a week, no structured activities, just rest. The result? Her kids were happier, and so was she.
The Power of Support: You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
The American Psychological Association notes that admitting you’re struggling with parenting isn’t always easy; unfortunately, this can lead to feeling more isolated and maybe even ashamed.
But I want you to know that you are not alone.
If summer has you feeling like you’re drowning, it’s time to reach for a lifeline.
Finding Strength in Community
Jake, a dad of three, found himself completely outnumbered during a summer trip to the zoo. One kid was screaming about wanting ice cream, another was trying to climb into the penguin exhibit, and the youngest had just taken off her shoes and thrown them into the flamingo pond. He stood there, utterly defeated, when another dad walked by gave him a knowing nod, and said “Hang in there, Dad. You got this.”
That little moment of solidarity—combined with a much-needed laugh—was enough to remind Jake he wasn’t alone. Parenting is messy, chaotic, and downright ridiculous sometimes. But when we lean on each other, it gets a whole lot easier.
Connected Parents Thriving Together
Connected Parents Thriving Together Facebook group is a 10-day online community I designed to help parents navigate stress and find support. It runs a couple of times a year, offering guidance, encouragement, and real-life strategies for self-care and stress management.
🌟 Here's the Rhythm for Connected Parents Thriving Together!
📅 Motivation Monday: Share your aspirations for self-care or building social support with the group! Let’s kickstart the week with positive intentions and encourage each other.
🎥 Tune-In Tuesday: Get ready for a drop-in video from me, where I'll share insights, communication tips, and inspiration to keep you motivated and focused on your journey.
🎉 Wellness Wednesday: Join the fun as I post polls and prompts to spark lively discussions and interactions among the group.
💡 Thoughtful Thursday: Another drop-in video from me, packed with reflections and encouragement based on group interactions.
🎈 Feel-Good Friday: Celebrate your wins, big or small! Share a story or a selfie, and let’s cheer each other on!
💬 Supportive Saturday: Need a hand? Share your roadblocks, and let’s problem-solve together in a judgment-free space.
🌿 Self-Care Sunday: While I take a break from posting, keep sharing and supporting each other! Focus on what rejuvenates you best.
By joining, you’ll:
Connect with other parents who get it
Gain practical tools to manage stress
Learn ways to prioritize self-care without guilt
Feel supported, heard, and encouraged
Parenting is hard, but you don’t have to do it alone. This group is here to remind you that you matter too.
Summer was supposed to be fun, but for Jason and Melissa, it felt like a battle. They were constantly arguing over who was handling childcare, whose job was more important, and why they hadn’t had a real date night in months.
One night, after a particularly heated argument over whose turn it was to take the kids to soccer camp, Melissa blurted out, “I feel like we’re co-workers, not partners!” Jason stared at her, realizing she was right.
That’s when they decided to seek couples coaching. During sessions, they learned how to communicate their needs without blame, divide responsibilities more fairly, and reconnect as a couple—not just as parents. They started scheduling weekly check-ins to plan out the week (instead of bickering every morning), and most importantly, they set aside dedicated time together—just the two of them.
By the end of the summer, they weren’t just surviving; they were thriving. They felt more like a team, and their relationship had a spark again.
Next Steps: Let’s Do This Together
Join the Connected Parents Thriving Together Facebook Group. Click here to join the group running April 5 - April 15, 2025.
Schedule a complimentary 15-minute consultation. Let’s talk about what’s stressing you out and how I can support you through individual or couples coaching. Book your session here
Get Essential Support for Single Parents: Get tips for managing life with less stress. Click here to get it!
Summer doesn’t have to be a season of stress. With self-care, support, and a little mindset shift, you can enjoy these months—without losing yourself in the process. Let’s make this the summer where you thrive, too.
*Note: I prioritize my clients’ privacy and never share their personal stories publicly. The experiences shared here are inspired by common parenting patterns and challenges I’ve observed.
©kristinbarnhart www.kristinbarnhart.com 860-333-8773
Comments